Wheat fields, Cornfields, and Brick Roads

When I was leaving Indian Rocks Beach, Florida, the quip that went with my departure was that I was “getting out of Dodge.” Well currently that doesn't apply, because I am, quite literally, in Dodge. My room at the Bed and Breakfast looks right down on Boot Hill. Really! Last night, I heard a gunfight. Again, really. Well, a pretend gunfight, anyway, staged to entertain the tourist. I heard it while I was sitting on my porch sipping wine!

I can’t help thinking of Matt Dillon and Kitty Russell.

Dodge City, Kansas prospered because of the railroads that came through town and because of the buffalo that roamed in great number on the plains. Hunters and business men shot thousands and thousands of buffalo primarily for their hides and sent the hides east on the rail cars. When the buffalo were decimated by greed, cattle ranches were established to provide much desired beef for eastern buyers. Beef is still the major product of the area. And outside the inn it smells a little like cattle, if you know what I mean.

It is a lovely Inn, the Boot Hill Bed and Breakfast. I met Janie and Susan and while we had breakfast we chatted. They have both experienced divorce and our conversation was good, filled with understanding and admiration and knowing and interest. It was good for me.

Now ......

I will, literally, get out of Dodge. But before I do, I will share some thinking.

Someone asked me if I have had any inspired ideas while on this journey across the USA. Has there been an epithany? Future intention? Understanding? Or has a life plan developed? Have I found direction? Well, until yesterday, I had to admit there had been nothing of that sort. Not yet! But truthfully, that‘s because I haven’t had time to really think. I have been so caught up with the scenery and otherwise visiting with such wonderful family and friends that I have not really stopped to ponder about life back in “Dodge.”

But yesterday, while traveling across the plains which do not excite my senses, I figured it was a good time to get serious, think about post road trip life, and create a vision and a strategy. There wasn’t much to distract me. For most of the day, driving through south eastern Colorado and western Kansas, all I saw was fields of stuff jusy beginning to grow and cattle roaming. For hours upon hours, fields and cattle. The flat terrain was occasionally interrupted by a grassy swell. Rather dull topography, although being able to see for miles ahead had a certain appeal. Anyway, it was a fine day for conversation with me, myself and I.

At first, a cloud of gloom managed to hang over the car, keeping pace, flashing hazy pictures of divorce and my ex as well as my ex B and B and the stuff I forgot to take with me. Throw in a few wisps of financial concern, things not said, things said, and what coulda shoulda been and I felt a little bummed for a while. But serious thinking needed to start there. Then, my thinking shifted gears even if my car didn't. I thought about how lucky I am to have so many terrific friends. I thought about my town, my community and my cool little unusual home (talk about creative use of office space!) although I would still like to have a real kitchen to cook in. I'll have to get one one way or another. I thought about this road trip and living a dream and about how far I have come both geographically and figuratively. I pictured a "perfect" life. But what I have, for the most part, has been really good. I am a mom and an artist. A traveler and a writer. I am woman , hear me roar!!!

A change in attitude with a change in latitude. A change in attitude changes ones reality! Think good thoughts as much as possible. Forgive, forget, and enjoy life. All that.....

I thought about how I would like to find a little romance (yeah, why not?), and about doing more traveling and painting and reading. (Gosh, I need time to read, I can barely find time to read a brochure let alone a book.) The cloud of gloom lifted and disappeared and there I was thinking, “Life is pretty darn good.” I would not give up the life I am making for myself for the relationship that was.

My epithany wasn’t really something new, and I haven’t firmed up any plans, but it reminded me that I’m OK. I don’t need to make any life altering decisions while I am on the road. I think they can wait until I get home and have time to sit and contemplate my next direction and my next nest. I am OK as is. And I still have a ways to go.

Maybe another day in the tall grass and I will come up with more.

The plains are, well plain. I loved the desert and the coast and the mountains, but I do not love the plains. I cannot imagine living here, so far from everything else. It would take all day to go to see something other than what is right under your nose. I left the mountains a day behind and don’t expect to see an ocean for more days than that. It is as hot as Florida and, in the winter, I suspect, as cold as Minnesota. This is no place for me.

So when I get back home, I think I shall take the time to go other places because I can. Saint Augustine, Disney World, the Everglades, or Dade City! Tuscany, Iceland, Machu Pichu!

Then again, as Dorothy surmized, “There’s no place like home.” She figured that out after being in a tornado and wandering around OZ with mythical characters!

Last night, just to let you know, I camped by a reservoir in Pueblo, Colorado. The warm wind was strong and I found a place to set up my tent under a gnarly juniper tree. The earth was clay and sand and studded with cacti and rocks. The stars were plentiful. I slept well.

On the drive here I got lost twice, which isn’t easy to do, given that there isn't much to distract me and the scarcity of roads, but somehow, twice, I missed a turn. One road looks much like another here in Kansas, I don’t know what made me think I was going the wrong way. There were no signs of any kind to let me know what road I was on or even what direction I was going. At noon it's hard to tell these things. Although I turned around to go back after driving ten miles out of the way, I wasn’t altogether sure I was even heading the wrong way in the first place, but turns out I was. Good thing I choose to go back and check or I would have been traveling south instead of east. I could of been in New Mexico tonight!